DON’t REALLY KNOW !!

‘So when do you know it is love’, ran the title of recently released flick (It was ‘Jaane tu…’ ). It did highlight the subtle differences between being ‘friends’ and ‘lovers’, and how ‘once friends’ eventually ended up being ‘soul mates’. I enjoyed the movie, had real fun, sound tracks struck a cord within and came back home. That’s all? That’s all the movie was there for? Having fun? “Of course, that’s what movies are supposed to do, to make you feel it was worth hundred bucks”, pat came the reply from my friend who had accompanied me to the theatre.

But I still don’t get it. Things are not as simple as portrayed in most of the ‘feel good’ flicks. How do you really tell you love someone? I know it’s such a cliché’ and most of us feel confident of guiding others through this trouble but when it comes to ourselves, what then?

Your heart is such a devil, it’s the most volatile and buoyant object that you possess. You begin to like someone and even before you can get pass the appearances it finds a new one to focus on to. Every time, every single time you are in ‘love’, you feel that’s the only thing you care about, nothing else is more valuable than holding on to the feeling. But as soon as it’s over and you look back in retrospect, you don’t believe the things you had said and done. It so gets to you that the next time you have the same feeling, you become suspicious of yourself. But you enter that ‘arena of love’ again nonetheless. This time you are more considerate and less impetuous. But all that still doesn’t last the test of time, there’s another ‘break-up’ or you just feel you’re ‘not interested’ any more, how mean!

After this process has repeated itself twice or thrice (in some cases), you slow down a bit and decide not to rush into things. C’mon, you are not sure of yourself and you still get involved only to leave you or the other person murdered (not literally). So why do it? And before you come to a situation where you’ve become mature, you again find someone. But this time, you do laugh at yourself and forget about all the ‘good stuff’ you had pondered upon.

Enough is enough! And you realize this when you meet one of your ‘once loved’ ones. She makes you feel what you yourself have felt at times. You try to do a ‘ Bachna Ae Hasino’, but very quickly you are reminded ‘life is no movie’.

You are a very ‘thinking’ sort of a guy, ‘philosophical’ at times. You can think of something to do, what for? To do something, but what for, seek redemption, sounds a pretty heavy term. Think, think, oh c’mon, it can’t be that bad. Oh screw every thing. You are not even twenty and one……………… Hey, that’s a lame excuse…. Yeah it is……. so what…………… you want a piece of me………

…… and on goes the duel between ‘mind’ and ‘heart’.

P.S. :: No efforts to draw any generalization have been attempted here. These are the reflections of one single soul